Mother Tucker

I’m sitting in front of my computer . . . the boys are sleeping, or should be anyway, and I’m tentatively “clocked out” for the evening. The “clocked out” bit gets easier as they get older and fall into nice little structured routines.

I did well today, diet wise, keeping it well under my calorie goals and worked out hardily in front of my tube to crazy blond Aussie and really really happy ab jam lady. She is pumped about abs! Not sure why the walk didn’t work itself into the picture, except the boys were crabby this afternoon and I didn’t feel the gumption to fight them into the stroller and make the best of it. That, the stroller bit, does not get easier as they get older. Bummer.

But currently I have a gigantic bowl of popcorn . . . I’d like to take this moment to thank my friend, Sarah, for creating an addiction to popcorn out of her generosity to buy me kernels once. Since I have been unable to resist a scrumptious bowl of popcorn . . . bowl is used loosely, as it more resembles a barrel than a bowl.

Nope, not ice cream, not chocolate, not even the whip cream and strawberries I bought on purpose as a ice cream substitute . . . nope, its the salty goodness of the popcorn.

Thank you, Sarah!

Thats really all I wanted to write about . . . making sure credit for the obsession is placed on the correct person, wouldn’t wanna confuse anyone. And I definitely couldn’t take personal responsibility, I’m American!

God Bless!

I didn’t mean for that last post to sound self righteous.  I have my many faults and do not live up to, even, my own standards most of the time . . . much less that of a faultless God. I am so very grateful for the grace God has chosen to show me in this life and lean completely and utterly on that . . . truth is something I’ve been convicted about gaining more of, through the Word, to balance out my daily walk with Jesus.

Nothing new to really update anyone on.  I do want to give honor to God for the place we call home right now.  A misunderstanding of a letter we received insinuated that we weren’t eligible to live here but it was ironed out quickly and we are no worse for wear.  God just keeps providing and keeps giving us favor where its obviously HIM.

And, again, finances just keep coming through! We are blessed with much more than money, but the finances are a necessity.

So, Justin tested for an officer position this past week; interview, written test, peer and teacher reviews . . . all 36 people left in the program did.  He should hear back next week.  Lieutenant or Captain (I believe) are one of the two he could be placed in . . . several people will be.  This is for the fire program and he will be over the first year students come Summer term.  Just the current update. So school is going good! He’s got a much more laid back term than last term . . . he’s home more frequently and he’s able to get to work study more often.

Samuel started going down the slide, at the playground, by himself.  For the past 3 months or so, he would climb the stairs just fine but then wait at the top for me to come set him on his rump and help him slide.  I kinda got busy talking to someone while they were playing and recognized he was at the top of the slide . . .  apparently I took too long; before I knew he was  squealing with delight as he came to the base of the slide. Tobias was on the slide next to him, so I’m sure he was watching and receiving coaching from his elder brother . . . but since then he has it figured out.  So very cute!! He’ll be 20 months May 12th and that means he nearing the 2 year mark! Crazy how life gets away from me . . .

Tobias, in the past couple of months has picked up singing. Mostly with his favorite movies and cd’s and sometimes to the radio with a random song. He mimics the sound and the words aren’t so clear but that does not keep the laughter at bay from mom and dad . . . or to keep us from joining him.  So far he’s been my hippety hopper (quite the moves that boy has!!) and now my crooner.  His dramatic nature just makes it so fun! I love it when he fake falls to the floor or dramatically fakes it as he runs into the wall and to the floor. I’m not sure where he picked that up but he’s obviously acting it out. And we really really have to keep an eye on what he watches cuz he mimics and acts out the stories and words with his toys, words and hands.

I have 15 pounds to go before I’m where I want to be physically.  Doesn’t seem like much but the last bit is so stubborn and motivation wanes with each passing pound. Thanks to Kacy I’ve revved it up with Billy Blanks’ Taebo videos.  I get so sore and keep saying “darn you, Billy Blanks, darn you,” whilst shaking my fist at the sky.  Justin keeps telling me that thats a really creepy thing to do and to knock it off.  hee hee. You know that just eggs me on. haa haa He’s not amused.

Well, geez . . . there’s an earful for ya . . . or eyeful, whatever.

We are in Harrisburg this fine weekend.  We are to be visiting and spending the night at some dear friends of ours, house.  An overnighter . . . thats a first in a long time, minus my parent’s house.  A bit nervous I am but so at ease when I remember how much we are loved and accepted by these cool people we call friends.

Welp . . . God bless!  I hope all of your weekends are fabulously full of family, friends and good times!!

mmm mmm . . . hotness! My hubby . . . don’t tell him I posted this, it would embarrass him.

So my pooch has decided that he needed pee on my floor . . . not once but 3 times in one week.  This is not ok . . . an occasional accident due to the negligence and absent-mindedness of the owner, thats understandable. Being outside to potty, coming inside and peeing in my floor within an hour and a half . . . all three times . . . not ok.

I was hot to trot, as they say, and the hubby received an email with some not-so-nice content about the dog he chose and how he needs a new home, etc.  Yeah, not a friendly email.  But the ‘hot-headedness’ wore off and I forgave, once again, the goofball of a dog known as Bye Bye (thanks to Tobias’ version of Byron).

Now, this is a 3 year old dog . . . well house trained since he’s resided in our home (wherever that may be) his entire life.  So, we’re gonna try getting out for walks, at least once a day . . . despite the weather. I’ve been hanging indoors, only going outside to let the boys romp about at the playground . . . doing my cardio indoors to Billy Blanks (thank you, K!) and the crazy Australian kickboxing lady.  Thats gonna have to change, I do believe . . . if we are to hang onto the dog I’ve come to tolerate and the boys adore.

I do love walking/jogging outdoors but I’m also routine oriented to a fault. Once I get started on a certain workout regime, thats what I do, day in and day out. So, with the weather turning cold/rainy once again, indoors win out.  Learn to be flexible . . . thats what I need, I suppose.  I’ll add it to the list of stuff to work on. Getting out and about will be easier as the weather gets nicer.

So, you can tell I’ve got many exciting things happening in my life right now. I’m talking about my dog peeing on the floor . . . can’t get anymore exciting than that!

God Bless!!

Not a way to start off the morning. I was feeling sorry for myself before ever pulling myself out of bed this morning.

I had plans to get myself up before 7am and get my jog/walk time in but didn’t . . . I blame the mild head cold that I have but it really isn’t a show stopper, so its not a legit excuse.

If I don’t go jogging (walk/jog) before J is getting ready to leave for school, I don’t get to go by myself . . . its a whole new type of event to load up my kids and make sure they’re cozy enough, fed, watered, etc . . . juice and snacks are provided on the trip. The solace of the outing is missing when the tots are present . . . instead whining persists . . . never enough snacks and juice. Why doesn’t my mother live closer!?! Poor me . . . I am always always serving and I just want time periodically or even spontaneously just to drop the boys off with my momma and breath for a bit

Ok, so the above paragraph are the negative statements floating around in my head as I’m making breakfast. I’m being relatively polite, despite the fact I hadn’t had my official cup of joe (our coffee pot is slow by the way) and I was deciding to wallow in the mire that is known as me and my friend selfish

Hubby, the dunce, had decided to hang around a bit this morning . . . not a good morning to do so. So the inevitable happened, the words I was allowing my brain and soul to digest instead of praying about them came out at him. He looks me in the eye and says “If you want to put the boys in daycare so you can pursue other things, we can . . . just let me know.” So matter-a-fact! My hackles raised . . . absolutely not. We’ve already built our lives around accommodating my staying home with them . . . what we decided was best . . . blah blah blah . . . I kept talking though it gets muttled in my brain as to what I actually said . . . I rant a bit sometimes.

But then it dawned on me . . . and, yes, I can be slow at times . . . that being home with my gorgeous boys is the only thing I want to do . . . its ok that I don’t have a built in babysitter (though I get envious occasionally with friends that do) and they aren’t this age forever, you know. It feels like it at times, but they aren’t. And, ultimately, if there’s less of me and my friend selfish, the more I can be full of someone else I admire more than anything or one in this world . . . Jesus. I’ve sucked it up lately, keeping my devotional time right, and I see it in my demeanor towards my hubby and my kids . . . time to set it right and keep it right. Thats my biggest prayer right now is to become steady in HIM, not just flip into grace, flip out of HIS covering, etc etc . . . kind of done being tossed by the waves of this life and my emotions . . .

Alright . . . so it hasn’t been the easiest time ever with Hubby in school and having two young toddlers . . . money can be tight tight at times and living in a new city has its major drawbacks (mostly away from family and friends) . . . but there is ONE whom I will never be separated, for eternity . . . and thats Jesus.

Wait for the LORD; Be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the LORD. -Psalm 27:14

I do love coffee . . . good, bad and the ugly tasting. I’ve had it all and still carry a pretty strong affection for the naturally caffeinated beverage. But I normally limit myself to coffee in the morning and the last cup by lunch time. Otherwise sleep eludes me to the point that I get annoyed at night.

Tonight shall be a rare exception. I just downed the last drop of my cup of joe . . .

I’m doing some minor work for my sister’s rotary club and I managed to start it out wrong so I got to go back and fix what I did wrong and continue on my merry way with it. Not realizing until 10pm that I was currently on page 2 and there were 10 pages of things to be added to the presentation. Um, I’m not going to finish tonight, like I had hoped. I sit on my cushioned bench, created to rest at the foot of my bed, but its been recruited as a fancy looking computer chair . . . with no back support. Ugh! And I have decently strong back . . . still very uncomfortable after several hours. And I was sleepy by 9pm, so I heated up the last remaining dregs left in the cold coffee pot from this morning. It helped ok . . . I’m still awake and functioning to some degree . . . now taking a break and contemplating going to bed while I write this.

So, I believe, after reading one of my good friend’s blog posts about her running a 10K . . . I have been encouraged, in a round about way to start jogging again. I’m so hard on myself. Before Tobias was born I had whittled my body down from well over 200 lbs to under 165 . . . which is good for my 5′10″ frame . . . all by running approximately 20 miles a week. Thats not a lot but its a heck of a lot more than I’m doing right now!

I got big and chubby during the 3 prego years but have managed to lose all but 20 lbs of it, mostly by eating properly and exercising with my crazy kickboxing lady dvd’s in the house. Kids sure complicate things . . . or I use them as an excuse, that could be, at times. But now the weather is getting nice and we (I mostly, the kids are comfortably sitting in the stroller) casually jog/walk (mostly walk) nearly everyday, I think its time to jump-start the old jogging routine . . . build back up to my 3 - 4 miles stints a day. Considering a mile is not in the picture at this point . . . I’ve got a ways to go . . . but I’ll share my joys, sorrows and victories with the three people that read this goofy blog . . . no worries. I have problem with not spilling my guts anyway.

So, all is good with the world of Mother Tucker. I’m going to take pics . . . every morning that I jog . . . that’ll be a good motivator to get out and do it. You don’t even have to pretend interested . . . how about that?!

Thats me at the thought of goal-setting . . . always disappointment to be had along the way . . . its how you deal with the disappointment and move forward as to whether or not you will attain your goal.

Its clearing!! Oh, thank you Jesus!  I was dreading doing the workout videos today . . . they do get old, especially the same 8 or so that I use consistently.  The boys will enjoy the jaunt as well as I’m sure . . . the short bursts of time outside don’t seem to squelch their amazing energy levels. Now the sun is shining!! Yippeee for me!

Energy levels I wish they would share with me today since my coffee canister is empty as empty can be.  I didn’t realize J had to be at school right away this morning so I figured I could just go out pick some up before he left . . . . oh no! Nope, he had to be there, pretty much, right after he woke up.  He’s getting groceries tonight, which I appreciate, but I will have to wait until tomorrow for my loving and addictive cup of joe.  This has happened too many times in the last couple of months . . . one should not have to endure such hardships as this more than once every few years! Catastrophe, there’s a word for it . . .

Ah well . . . hey, my dad is doing really good.  They have a park about 15 minutes (walk) from their house and he’s been trekking that twice a day.  The doc said do if he can and he has. I’m so thankful to God for the surgery going good and a quick recovery! I won’t be going down until later in the summer. Finances are always playing a part, aren’t they?! Ugh!

Well, I’m getting off this thang . . . sure sucks the life-blood right out of you . . . kind of like watching tv. 

God Bless and have a great rest of the week!

I had an appointment for the boys this morning, just a regular check up appointment.  But for some God-forsaken reason I made it for buttcrack of dawn time slot . . . ok, not so much . . . 8:30am.

But to pull off being somewhere, across town, by 8:30am I had to proceed to pull myself from my nice warm blankies by 6:30am . . . and that’s pushing the time frame. I gotta have time to get a cup of coffee (at least) into my system before steering a vehicular with my precious bundles inside.

So that’s how our morning started. We ate breakfast on the road cuz apparently we were out of fast food breakfast (i.e. cold cereal, bread for toast, etc) so chocolate milk and sugar cookies held us over until we got home. Ok, that’s a really bad breakfast . . . even a stupid-head like myself knows that.

But to furnish breakfast when we got home, we had to do a store run.  We were, miraculously at the check up appt. for an hour . . . an hour, mostly waiting . . . for something that was scheduled. grrr. Anyhoo, got to WalMart Superstore . . . gotta love it.  I do love cheap prices, hence the reason we go there. Got the bare essentials for a decent breakfast . . . well now a brunch cuz by the time we unloaded the car it was 10:20am and finally ate a nice, well-balanced meal.  Though I think they had filled up on sugar cookies cuz the breakfast was, for the most part, ignored.

Man, the words . . . I’m so wordy.  Anyhoody, I wrote this to say that we don’t go many places.  We are super duper poor right now, which is fine cuz my husband is doing swimmingly at school and he’ll do even better as a fireman once he has graduated with his paramedic and fire suppression degrees . . . so suck it up, I will!! But we only use the one car and he usually has it.  The boys and I do go places, when the weather cooperates, using the trusty double stroller and some good old leg action; we’re blessed to be by a busy commercial district. That’s nicely put.

The boys . . . thats what I want to write about . . . back to the subject at hand . . . see post ‘Dysfunction of Sorts’ to understand me better. 

Tobias and Samuel (Samuel was mostly feeding off T’s excitement) were both so excited to be going on a car ride. The whole ritual of finding cute clothes, watching me put their socks and shoes on . . . packing the diaper bag/’bring lots of clothes cuz Toby is being potty trained’ bag . . . their little sippy cups, diapers for Sam (and T if the need arises), snacks (sugar cookies . . . yeah, major grocery store run in the works), blankets and coats.  I think I covered it . . . too exhilerating . . . reading the contents of a woman’s diaper bag.

So excited they were!! Too bad they just got measured, weighed and other fun check-up stuff and a jaunt around Wally World . . . but they enjoyed their outing today.  And they loved the car ride.  You should have heard Tobias go on and on about the ‘Yig Trucks’ (translated Big Trucks) and the jps (jeep wranglers . . . not sure where this obsession came from . . . I’m personally not a fan of the warmed over redneck vehicle myself) and cooool cars (speaks for itself) and mtrsickles (motorcycles) . . . Ah, I’m sure there’s more but I will cut your boredom short a bit. Sorry about that. When we go on walks he sees many many vehicles and things but apparently they are much more interesting out a car window.

We then proceeded to take naps . . . I mean the boys took their naps . . . and then spent every waking second outdoors afterwards cuz the sun was shining and it was warm . . . 60 degrees or so warm! Nice!! A walk is good for all involved!!

So, that was my day . . . not so much going on.  I feel like I’m just hanging out waiting for something to happen . . . all the time. Its weird.  I’m usually a busy sort and find it very hard sometimes to deal with the circumstances at hand . . . but by God’s grace I’m doing, somewhere between Ok and good. Sometimes not so ok, but that’s rare nowadays.

God Bless!!

Ok, a picture is worth a thousand words. I’ll try to keep it under 500. The dog, as much as he is adored, he is loathed . . . I don’t know why I can’t come to love him fully . . . perhaps it is because he is my sole responsibility and no one else’s . . . even the hubby that really really really wanted a Jack Russell! Who wants a Jack? But he does amazingly well with the chitlins and doesn’t poop or pee (for the most part) on my floor, so he’s a keeper.  …that, and he’s indestructible. Its the only Jack we’ll ever get (which works fine cuz they average like 18 year life spans). This car ride took place about 4 weeks ago and we were coming home from church . . . note the shoe-less wonder (T), his pinkies peeking above the front seat. :)  The only thing missing is the treats and the juice . . . both seem to flow a bit freer when we’re on car rides; possible reason for car ride fanaticism.

Ok, its afternoon in my little sphere of the known and familiar.

But its been a good and active weekend; leaving little time to sit on the ‘puter.

Yesterday was b.e.a.utiful here in the Willamette Valley of Oregon. It had to have gotten into the mid-50’s or so, though I never checked for sure. All I know is we left our jackets in the car when we got out to play at the park yesterday afternoon; donned in sweatshirts for warmth. That was a refreshing feeling; the freedom of movement alone was so nice.

We ordered pizza, bought icecream and made cookies . . . it was my one and only “day off” from my workout/diet routine; this keeps me motivated for the next week, instead of deprivation at all times I get to splurge, eating wise, once a week.

Justin and I put the kids to bed close to 9pm, much later than normal and popped a flick in the old DVD player. Since we have a library to choose from we didn’t even take the time and energy to rent. We had some good talks and good times and went to bed around 2am. That is WAY past my bedtime so I’m a bit drowsy today. Though, my best-friend Coffee is here with me so I’m getting by. hee hee

My sister, Kelli is bringing me some new workout dvd’s on Thursday . . . I am SO excited about this. I’ve been doing the same like 6 or 7 dvd’s for a year . . . A YEAR! EEKS! No wonder the motivation to stare at the same Australian blondie and the crazy martial arts lady is waning. No, I’m grateful for what I have and I can’t wait until the weather is conducive to having the kids out for short runs here in the spring/summer.

I don’t think it’s normal to still be burping pizza close to 20 hours after you ate. Yuck. I had a small breakfast, but no, its the pizza I taste when I burp. And my stomach feels oh so gross with glutinously bad decisions. Such motivation is derived from crappy eating one day a week . . . its amazing!!

Alright, when I start to repeat myself its time to end the post.

God Bless!

Ah, I felt good. I had gotten the second work out of the day in, one usually does it, but the fat is stubborn these days. I was in the process of cleaning my house. The kids had both eaten a good dinner and now relaxed in the living room with their various toys of choice, occasionally trying swap toys of choice for their brother’s toys of choice which would result in shoving and ear-piercing screeching until the matter was settled; usually by me.  But all was normal and good the house. I had skipped doing my shower directly after working out, opting to sweat doing housework in the same slightly sweaty workout clothes.  I know, kind of gross, but I don’t feel like showering twice before bed; especially when bedtime is 2 hours away.

On that note, my hair was frizzy frizz (I have naturally curly hair), I have ratty sweat pants on and a baggy fleece sweatshirt. Oh yeah and I had opted for my comfy, taped together glasses rather than my contacts.  So I was a picture to behold, beauty still-framed. Yeah, not quite, actually quite the opposite.

Justin walks in from being at school and announces that Tod (his study-buddy and co-fireman) brought him home and he has to take off immediately due to studying for mid-terms this week. Whatever, I’m used to these announcements so I shrug it off, not thinking much about it and return to my house work.

He walks out the door and comes back seconds later with Tod (whom I’ve never met or even spoken with) and starts to introduce us. Embarrassed as I was at my appearance, my house and the fact my boys were running around in their skivies, Tod was congenial, friendly and seemed well at ease despite the mess.

This is my wife,” Justin says (still willing to claim me, that says something for Justin) I shake Tod’s hand and say something, I don’t remember what

Justin continues. .”This Toby . . . “

Tod says hi to Toby and Toby quickly warms to him and then takes over Justin’s intro’s . . “this is Sam,” Tobias says proudly, pulling Sam to the forefront.

We all laughed, but my heart warmed simultaneously.

I have been amazed how much Tobias has grown, not in stature but in communication and general knowledge. He is picking up words like mad and uses them regularly.  I love this and I try to catch myself at the end of a long day; when Toby is jabbering away, only half discernible, just excited at life; from showing my fatigue by becoming annoyed with him. I want to encourage him to communicate with me and his dad. I don’t want him to ever feel like he has to shove things down and deal.  He’s got his whole adult life to look forward to that. 

Samuel, approximately 10 months old . . . got his grandfather’s ( my dad’s) grin. Goofy.

I stay up later and later these days. Not sure why. Mainly because the kiddos don’t rise and shine until approximately 8am. Which is about an hour and a half later than they did 6 months ago. Nice, eh?!

I just thought I’d throw a blab of the day in and then call it a night.

Nothing much new in the Tucker household. Justin has mid-terms this week so he’s been studying his brains to a frazzled pulp this weekend. Which means he hasn’t been around much. Mentally or physically since he studies at the firehouse/school.

My sister Tiff will hopefully make it up this week as well another good friend of mine . . . preferably different days; gotta spread’em out a bit. Then some good friends of Justin and I’s are coming down this weekend. They just moved back from CO recently and it will be good to see them again!! I love all this company I’ve been having!!! I’ve felt isolated at times and I’m thankful to God for all the encouragement as of late in this department of life.

Ahh, boys are doing so good. Being on the same nap schedule has freed two hours of my day, smack dab in the middle of my day at that. I call it my break. “I’m going on break” Once they go to bed at night I’m “Clocked out”. Figuratively speaking, that is, cuz you know who goes running into their rooms if they even make a peep . . . me, that’s who. It’s like working a 12 hour day with one 2 hour lunch break and on call all night. I’ve definitely heard of worse . . . and I don’t necessarily have to change out of my pj’s if I don’t wanna.

So I’ve been doing so good on my diet/workout plan. Today was my ‘day off’ from exercising so, of course, I had to devour the piece of chocolate cake and a bit of icecream waiting for me in the fridge (thanks a lot J . . . and Thank you so much, it was soooo good!). So back at it tomorrow am! I dropped 4 lbs this week and gained 2 lbs back just by eating a giant piece of cake. That’s not very productive.

Anyway, that’s about all I have to blab about tonight. I know, I’m so exciting you almost fell asleep. Oh well, just like tv, no one is making you read this . . . just turn the channel.