Blah

I’m gonna complain . . . just a forewarning.

We got our tax return, thats what we were to live on and get caught up with, including our vehicles insured.  It was not nearly the amount we were expecting . . . I still can’t figure out where the breakdown in communication in figuring all that out happened but it was considerably less than expected. Soooooo, life will go on as usual . . . pretty much home-bound for awhile longer.  I’m frustrated and irritated and disappointed. I miss my church, my family, my friends and just plain being able to get around without a double stroller and waiting for weather to clear enough so we don’t contract pneumonia.  I can’t seem to bring my spirits up today but I keep praying for understanding and insight into why I am where I am . . . right now.

I know God is bigger and has a bigger plan than my view of my hand in front of my face.  I think it might boil down to just plain trusting in HIM.  Who do I think I am to challenge the plans of such a God that has love deeper than I’ll ever experience in this lifetime . . . and has my best interest at heart . . . not to mention wisdom beyond the ages and the all knowing thing that HE possesses? :)  I know one thing, I am absolutely in love with my God and nothing in this life, because of the sacrifice of Jesus, will ever separate me from that love.  No matter how isolated I feel or anxious about life . . . HE holds the prominent spot in my heart and life.  He has seen to my needs and wants thus far . . . I trust HE will continue to do so.

Oh, on the positive, trusting God note.  My dad is doing awesome!! He said he’s not as in as much pain as they lead him to believe prior to the surgery.  He’s sitting up for several hours at a time and says he already feels a difference in the way he feels . . . for the better!!!  Thank you, thank you, thank you God!!!! God is good, so very good and faithful  . . .  not as humans are faithful but only as God can be faithful . . . unchanging!  Thank you God!

Now I’m smiling.  Its good to recount the blessings and goodness of God to counteract the negativity that attacks sometimes.  So I thank you God and I trust you with our immediate future, as well as our long-term future . . . all is in YOUR hands!!

Thought: I don’t need to understand what God’s doing, I just need to get humble under HIS hand and stay there to see it through.  I choose to be abandoned to the ONE who loved me out of my pit and my despair! 

God Bless!